BREAKING NEWS: Christmas season crime is on the rise. Police have issued a Be On the Look Out (BOLO) for some shady characters. The Hamilton County Sheriff’s Department was conducting routine door-to-door canvassing. They had two suspects in custody, but the culprits refused to provide identification. When Sergeant Tyler Abbitt met two young residents, they were able to provide positive ID. The cop then turned over the two Elf on a Shelf Bandits to the youngsters.
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The crime was breaking and entering and vandalizing Christmas trees. The elves entered several residences on the block to deposit underwear on the trees instead of ornaments. There is no report on whether the undergarments were clean or soiled (and do we really want to know?).
Officer Tyler brought a mugshot of the two suspects and showed it to the children. The children recognized the bandits immediately. The cop then took the children out to his waiting patrol SUV for a more positive ID of the Elf on a Shelf Bandits. As soon as the rear door opened, the kids were sure. These were the two Elf on a Shelf elves assigned to their home.
The children were hesitant to accept custody of the bandits. Children must never touch an Elf on a Shelf, but the cop insists. Supposedly, the elves will lose their magic if touched by human children. Hopefully, since it is early in the season, the elves will retain their magic.
Last year, there was a similar incident involving Buddy the elf. These elves can be unpredictable and very naughty. If you have an Elf on a Shelf, please keep them out of trouble to avoid a visit from a cop.
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